Now I am rather excited as on the 30th April my hubby C and I trotted off to the hospital for my 20 week scan, my daughter confirmed she wanted to know what was in mummies tummy! As soon as they started the scan we new instantly it was very obvious we are having a boy.
This has delighted C no end she has only ever wanted a brother and has previously told me that if it was a girl she was going in the bin.
Now being arthritic and pregnant is not always a happy Combination. I have Ankylosing Spondilitis which is in my spine and hips and has a weakening effect on the muscle skeletal system which leaves you very prone to inflammation and a lot of aches and pains. I have a lot if issues with neck movement and am now suffering with reactive arthritis in other joints.
I am currently having major issues with my knees normally my left but this week has thrown a curve ball at me and my right knee has swollen so big it resembles Frankensteins knee.
Now this dodgy knee is making life very difficult as I am struggling to get around unable to look after C and get her to nursery as we don’t own a car, this has loaded enormous pressure on my already very tired and busy husband. I am currently on crutches and on Thursday spent 7 hours in A&E having my knee drained several times which to put it politely was bloody painful. Now as i don’t have family nearby who can help out so I had to spend all that time on my own while my husband looked after my daughter at home, their is nothing lonelier than being stuck in hospital in pain and pregnant while having excruciating treatments done to you. I shed many tears and all I wanted was a hug or a comforting hand to hold. I know it sounds like I am wallowing in self pity and to be honest i am a bit! my condition is painful and not always visible so many people just wonder what the hell is wrong with me this time.
I have this Jubilee weekend been particularly poorly my knee has been so huge that I have been unable to bend let alone walk on my leftt leg, then my right ankle started to swell, I was so uncomfortable that my specialist called me in for emergency treatment which was painful but so worth it and I am hoping that in a few days I will be back to my normal chipper self.
I hate being in pain and I loath my condition! I have had it since I was 21 and runs in my family along with rheumatoid arthritis and it has struck many of my family young and old, I thank my lucky stars that I am not as bad as some. My condition is no walk in the park it is uncomfortable and painful and can get me quite low. Being in constant pain is physically and mentally draining and having a toddler and being pregnant just burdens the situation.
BUT that said I would not change my situation for the world I have a beautiful daughter a son on the way a fabulous husband who has been with me since the day I was diagnosed and a home I am proud of (it may not look like a palace but it is mine!)
I feel that 90% of the time my condition has actually made me a stronger person I can handle a lot being thrown at me, I can now laugh heartily at the things that used to wind me up and have more compassion and understanding towards others
I really believe the saying “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger!”